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“I Hate You, Mom!”
Have you ever found yourself standing in an aisle at the grocery store, in total shock, because your child, who didn’t get to buy a bag of chips or a chocolate bar because it’s a Tuesday afternoon, called you a bad mom, said “I hate you” for the first time, or maybe even worse, said F you.
If this has happened to you, I assume that you responded in one of two ways. You either said the following phrase:
“Stop it or you’ll never get to go with me to the grocery store ever again.”
Or you responded by bargaining with your child and said:
“If you stop calling me a bad mom, then I’ll buy you the candy.”
If you said one of these two things, do you know what you taught your kid? You taught her that this kind of behavior is acceptable. I mean, she got what she wanted (which in this case was the candy), right?
[bctt tweet=”Have you ever had your child say ‘I hate you’ because they didn’t get what they wanted? You need to read this now.” via=”no”]
Remember to Bookmark, Print or Pin this list so you can easily access it the day you start to wonder how you can teach your child respect.
How To Teach Your Kids Respect
Respect is an attitude that can be shown to others by words or by actions. A child who is respectful takes care of her toys and are kind to her friends, gets along with her parents and other grown-ups.
While a child who hasn’t learned to be respectful, well, isn’t.
A lot of people wonder why kids these days have gotten so much more disrespectful than ever before.
Children are using foul language, talking back, ignoring their parents, and simply doesn’t respect their teachers and other authority figures. And what’s even worse? We’re starting to think that this is normal, that this is the way our kids are supposed to be.
Children aren’t born with a built-in sense of respect for others. But here’s the good news. It’s never too late to start teaching your child about respect. Of course, it’s easier to teach them this when young but it’s never, ever too late. Even if your child is a teenager, it’s not too late to preach.
There is no step-by-step model that can be applied to all children to teach respect. But here are 6 action steps that can help you teach your child about respect, and finally also get them to respect you.
Related: How To Get Alone Time As A Mom (No, It’s Not Selfish, And Here’s Why) [bctt tweet=”Here are 6 action steps that can help you teach your child about respect and get them to respect you! #Parenting” via=”no”]
1. Be On The Same Page
If you want to be able to change a behavior, you need to be on the same page as parents. This won’t work if you’re trying to raise your child in two different ways. If only one of you are correcting your child when he or she says something disrespectful, your child will get confused. As a result, your child might become even more disrespectful and try to turn you and your partner against each other.
2. Be Realistic
When your child does or says something disrespectful, the consequences need to be realistic. Grounding your child for a week or sending him to bed without dinner for saying something he shouldn’t is too harsh. It will only make your child resent you. You will have to make sure that the consequences match the behavior.
[bctt tweet=”Do you ground your child for being disrespectful? It’s time to start being realistic! #ParentingAdvice”]
3. Stay Calm
When your child is being disrespectful, take a deep breath and think about the circumstances. Avoid overreacting and instead, think about what the reason for your child being disrespectful might be. Ask your child why he acted like he did or why he said what he said. Later, when things are calm, talk about what happened and how your child could have done things differently.
4. Have An Open Mind
Encourage your child to have an open mind about things. Let her try new and unusual activities, visit places you’ve never been (you don’t need to travel for this. You could just go to a new playground or a museum), and connect with new people. Interacting with people who aren’t like-minded will teach your child that there is more than one (her) way to think. Having an open mind won’t just make your child respect other people, but it might also make her a better problem-solver throughout life.
5. Say “Thank You”
Basic manner like saying “Thank you” and “Please” is just that, basic. But it’s still something that we have to teach our children. There’s no child who knows when to say “thank you” without having learned this from the parents. Teach your child this basic social interaction skills and it will go a long way. It teaches your kids to respect others and recognize their impact on other people.
6. Respect Your Child
In order to teach, you need to be a great teacher. Start treating your child with the same respect you would treat other grownups. There’s no better way to teach your child how to be respectful, then by simply respecting them. Children are mirrors and they reflect back to us everything we say and do. [bctt tweet=”Respect can only be earned and never demanded. Earn that respect by being a good role model!”]
Start teaching your child about respect as soon as they start to talk and interact with other people. But they might also need reminders of this throughout their lives. Whenever you see that your child is being disrespectful, sit down with your child and talk to them about their behavior. Discuss the situation and listen to what your child has to say. And make sure that they understand that disrespectful behavior will never be acceptable.
One of the most important things you can teach your child is how to show respect. Teaching a child to be respectful is not as difficult as it may seem and the best way to teach respect is by far, to show respect yourself.
Let’s chat down below! What methods have worked for getting your child to respect you?
A stay at home mom of two whose goal is to help you make every day a good day. She shares practical solutions and more efficient ways of doing things so we can stop struggling with our homes and spend time on the things that count!